


Take It Lying Down

by Vae



Series: kink bingo fills [3]
Category: Adam Lambert (Musician)
Genre: Community: kink_bingo, Dom/sub, Enemas, First Time, Intimacy, M/M, Trust
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-26
Updated: 2012-11-26
Packaged: 2017-11-19 15:29:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/574802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Vae/pseuds/Vae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brad gives Adam his first enema.</p><p> </p><p>  <i>To be frank, Brad's not sure that Adam's expecting to feel good at all. He suspects that Adam's only agreed to try it at all out of trust and because he thinks Brad's going to like it. Okay, so Brad is going to like it, is already liking it, and trust like that is amazing, but maybe it's time for Adam to learn that Brad really has been paying attention to Adam's body and Adam's reactions to everything they've done together, and just perhaps he's learnt a few things about what Adam's going to like. Getting past that expectation is just part of why trying things is so awesome and why talking about them is totally not a suitable substitute. </i></p>
            </blockquote>





	Take It Lying Down

"So we're doing this why?" Adam closes the door behind him - nice and slowly, Brad notices approvingly, smooth and quiet, well controlled - and leans back against it, his hands folded behind him.

Brad smooths the top towel into place, nods and pats it, finally satisfied. There's a plastic sheet under it, of course, because this has every kind of potential to get messy and they can't afford to stain or damage a perfectly good mattress, but that's no reason for Adam to have to actually feel the plastic sheet. Plastic sheets mean sweaty skin, and Brad wants to be sure that any sweat he sees on Adam comes from his reactions to what's happening, not just getting clammy. Besides, plastic sheets make all kinds of crinkly noises when someone moves on them, and Brad _doesn't_ want that kind of soundtrack. 

(He doesn't want the whale music that Cassidy suggested either, but the idea of a soundtrack he can control is way more appealing.)

"Because it's good for you," he says brightly, holding his hand out towards Adam - then turning it, palm up, and beckoning Adam with a curl of his fingers. "It's got herbs in it, that's healthy. And because I want to."

Maybe that's playing dirty, but Brad has no compunctions about playing dirty. (Not messy, dirty. There's a difference.) It's not like Adam's going to hesitate to say something if he _really_ doesn't want to do it. Boy's got a voice and uses it very well. Open and honest communication's never been one of their issues. Still, Brad knows that Adam will try most things for the sake of pleasing him - which is very clear from the look on his face right now - and that just means one more thing that Brad can use. 

"How about if I want to?" Adam asks, arching an eyebrow and not moving closer. His robe's gaping open over his chest, but not any lower yet. Never mind. It won't stay on much longer. 

Brad sighs, drops his hand, and plants it firmly on his cocked hip instead. "Don't you want to? Because if you don't wanna try this, princess..."

"I didn't say I don't wanna." The hands come out from behind Adam's back at last, which closes the gap in his robe some, but gives Brad a slightly better idea of what's going on. It's not genuine reluctance, or Adam would be keeping his hands out of sight. It's not real fear, or Adam's hands would be folded back together. Which leaves nerves, and Brad is totally prepared to deal with nerves. Mostly by ignoring them.

"Okay, good, so get your ass over here." Brad pats the towels again before moving around the bed to the same side Adam's on, turning towards him and very purposely not touching the stand. In fact, getting between Adam and the stand. "You know we're gonna stop any time you need to."

Need, not want. He's fully expecting Adam to want to stop several times, but that's not the same thing as needing to. 

Adam chews on his lower lip, nods, and starts towards Brad and the bed. 

"Ah ah ah, princess." Brad holds his hand up, fixing Adam with a hard look. "Leave the robe behind. You know I wanna see you."

That stops the progress instantly. "Brad..."

"Not," he says firmly, "negotiable. Robe off _now_ , Adam."

It takes a moment more of hesitation, but Adam sighs, unfastens the tie of his robe, and shrugs it off, looping it over one arm. Brad watches appreciatively. Adam might still not be entirely comfortable with his body, but they're working on that, and this, no matter what Adam thinks, is definitely part of it. 

"Good," he says, nodding at the half-smile on Adam's face. "Better. Head up, put that down - no, I don't care where, I just wanna see you. All of you."

"You're gonna see more of me soon," Adam says wryly, looks around, and finally lets his robe drop to the floor. Naked and gorgeous, even if Adam can't see it himself. Tall and lean and broad, long legs and wide shoulders, smooth chest, long legs sprinkled with freckles, narrow hips, neatly trimmed red hair framing his thick cock - a cock which, so far, is apparently totally uninterested in what's going to happen.

Brad's planning on changing that. "Oh, I'm not gonna look at what comes out." He wrinkles his nose. "So not what I'm into. So, come on over here. Trust me, you do _not_ want this water to get cold."

Neither does Brad. He's not aiming for cramps. If the water does get cold, he'll add a little more warm, but Adam doesn't need to know that. Adam needs to get his ass over to Brad and the bed so they can get started already. 

"I'm not even gonna ask." Adam rolls his shoulders back, visibly settles himself, and gets his delectable ass - and the rest of him but, being totally honest, Adam's ass is mostly what Brad's immediately interested in - over to Brad.

At last. Brad rewards Adam with a warm smile, considers for a moment, then climbs up onto the bed so he can reach to kiss Adam, both hands framing his face for a few seconds before stroking down to his shoulders. "Cramps," he says simply. "I'm not gonna say you're not gonna get any at all, but you're less likely to with warm water. It's not gonna hurt, baby. We're not gonna hurt you today."

Another time, maybe. Probably, even. But not today. Not the first time Adam tries it. There's even the possibility that Adam won't like it at all, but that's not a possibility that Brad's entertaining. That possibility can fuck right off because this is all about positivity and that possibility is negativity squared.

Positive thoughts. Brad hops back down from the bed, tugs the towels back into place, then gives Adam a beaming smile, reaching for his arm. "Okay, so, you just lie down here..."

Adam laughs - _good_ \- and some of the tension goes from his shoulders. "I got that much."

"So do it." Brad sighs, goes around Adam, and physically pushes him towards the bed. "On your side, face me, bring your top knee up."

"Both my knees are the same level," Adam protests, and earns himself a swift spank for it. Well, his ass is _right there_ and totally fucking spankable. "Okay, fuck, I'm moving."

"So move." Brad pushes once more, only easing up when he can see that Adam actually is moving towards the bed, lying down and rolling over. Brad nods in satisfaction, and taps Adam's top leg. "This one. Top. God, your choreographers must want to strangle you six times a session, remind me to send them a fruit basket or something for not strangling you, no, bring it up higher. Nice and open for me."

Color creeps up Adam's throat as he moves, and he resettles, one arm hooked below the pillow under his head the same way he does when he's about to sleep, the other arm bent to brace and balance himself. "It's not that big."

"It's not that big," Brad agrees, studying Adam critically and only reaching out once he's sure that Adam's stopped moving. "But I wanna get good access and I wanna see what I'm doing. You wanna see it again?"

"I already saw it," Adam says hastily. "I'm good."

"We'll see about that." So far, Adam's not been that good. He's not been bad, but there's been way too much hesitation and caution for Brad to call it good. "You trust me, right?"

Adam sighs and closes his eyes. "With my life."

"So trust me with your ass." Brad pats the ass in question once more, then leans into it slightly, rubbing more firmly, looking over to make sure and God, Adam really does have a beautiful ass, his hole neat and tight. Maybe next time they'll talk about shaving, but that's for next time. "C'mon, princess. Relax. It's not like I'm gonna put my fist up there." This time.

It gets him another little laugh, and another sign of Adam relaxing. "You're gonna put more up there than that."

"Two quarts," Brad says dismissively, keeping up the rubbing. Maybe he can't make Adam's mind relax but he's determined to make Adam's ass relax. "It's not as much as you think. Stop tensing up on me."

"I'm trying," Adam grumbles, turning his face into the pillow.

"That would be the problem," Brad points out, reaching out with his left hand to tug on Adam's hair. "No, I wanna see your face, too." Really, really wants to see Adam's face. If Adam's at all hesitant in saying anything, Brad's confident he'll be able to see it in Adam's expression first. For an actor, Adam's shit at hiding his feelings, and Brad loves that.

Another sigh, and Adam turns his head again, fingers curling and pressing against the sheet. If Brad could see through Adam's nail polish, he suspects that the tips of Adam's fingers would be pale with the pressure, but he can't, so all he can do is bend to kiss the back of Adam's hand. Maybe the anticipation of waiting's worse than trying to wait for Adam to get comfortable. It's not always easy to tell. 

"Okay, baby." Brad lets his voice gentle a little, right hand still resting on Adam's ass. "I'm gonna get the lube now, I'm gonna go where you can't see me for a couple of minutes." Not that it makes much difference when Adam's got his eyes closed, but he's still going to tell Adam what's going on. More, even, if Adam's not looking. 

"You're disappearing?" Adam cracks an eye open.

"I'm going behind you," Brad tells Adam, pats his ass, and moves. No more waiting. There isn't much room to get around the bed, but he's pulled it out on purpose so he can fit around, tugging lube from where he'd wedged it under the mattress earlier. Leaving it out and visible just seemed like another way to make Adam more nervous his first time. "So unless you've got eyes in the back of your head or you're gonna go all Exorcist on me..." He pauses, shudders. "Okay, yeah, no, don't go Exorcist on me. Don't turn your head back _even if you can_ because I don't wanna know you can do that."

"I thought you liked me flexible." Adam shifts, his shoulders moving as he settles his hand again. 

"Not your neck that flexible," Brad says firmly and slaps Adam's shoulder. "Are you done moving?"

"I'm done," Adam promises, sounding amused. Which is good, amused is totally better than tense or reluctant, even if Brad's sure that amusement isn't going to last too long. 

"Yes, you are." Brad taps Adam's hip, just to check (and maybe also to see how it makes Adam's ass move), then braces his right foot against the bed, lube bottle against his right thigh, and pumps some out into his palm. Not too much - there really is such a thing as too much - but just enough to warm to his skin so he can slick his first two fingers, rubbing the pads of them gently over Adam's hole, back and forth a couple of times before circling, almost massaging. 

Adam might be apprehensive about what's coming next but he's never been able to resist having his ass played with. Brad smiles smug satisfaction to himself as the tightness begins to relax, as _Adam_ begins to relax under his persistent slow circling. Gentle but firm, steady, not wasting any time, starting to ease his index finger in as soon as Adam's ass begins to open enough to let him in. 

Brad's definitely going to talk to Adam about fisting some other time. "There, that's it, baby, open up for me, feels good, right? You do, so tight for me, just think how clean you're gonna be, wait until you're all clean for me, see how good you're gonna feel."

To be frank, Brad's not sure that Adam's expecting to feel good at all. He suspects that Adam's only agreed to try it at all out of trust and because he thinks Brad's going to like it. Okay, so Brad _is_ going to like it, is _already_ liking it, and trust like that is amazing, but maybe it's time for Adam to learn that Brad really has been paying attention to Adam's body and Adam's reactions to everything they've done together, and just perhaps he's learnt a few things about what Adam's going to like. Getting past that expectation is just part of why trying things is so awesome and why talking about them is totally not a suitable substitute. 

He rests his left hand on Adam's hip again and leans over, crooning soft praise until he's sure he can push both fingers in without too much work. Until Adam's giving him those sweet, low sounds that make him sure that... oh, yeah. Looking over, looking further, he can see Adam's cock filling for him, thicker and harder against his hip, darker head just touching the towel spread on the bed.

Totally saving that for later.

When Adam rocks back onto his fingers, Brad stops, drawing his hand back and tightening his grip on Adam's hip, pushing him forward into place again. "I said still, princess. So I guess that means you must be ready for more."

Adam blinks, eyes opening slowly and... okay, right, that's not full Exorcist, that's okay, just far enough and Brad's bending over anyway, it's okay that Adam can turn far enough to see him. "For more?"

"For the nozzle," Brad says with a smile, pats Adam's hip, and checks the fluid in the tube. Still warm, thank fuck. Still, he's going to make sure that it's all the way down, letting a little flow through into the bucket under the bed before going back for more lube and making sure the nozzle's nice and slick before he presses it against Adam's ass. "There we go, see? Not that big. C'mon, baby, breathe for me, keep it nice and deep... that's it."

It slides in so easily. It's nearly easy enough that Brad wonders if he's taken too much time on getting Adam to relax, but apparently the pressure of the nozzle's enough to make Adam tense again, at least enough to be sure that it's lodged securely inside him, gliding in eased by the lube and by Brad's steady guidance.

Brad watches attentively, tracing the tip of his finger around the nozzle once it's seated before tapping it lightly against Adam's ass. "All in. How's that feeling?"

Adam pauses a moment before answering, but at least he doesn't try to do the Exorcist thing to actually look. (Brad considers that next time, if there's a next time, he really should get some mirrors set up so Adam can see.) "Weird," he concludes eventually.

Weird isn't great, but Brad honestly hasn't encountered that many guys who really genuinely enjoy the feel of a nozzle in their ass, even the ones who know what's coming next. "Weird bad? Weird uncomfortable?"

"Just weird." Adam shakes his head, hair making a faint scratching sound against the pillow. "Not uncomfortable. It doesn't hurt. It's just... weird."

Probably a lot slimmer than anything else inanimate Adam's had in his ass, but as long as it's not a bad weird, Brad's totally good with taking weird as good enough to go on. "Well, this is probably gonna feel a bit more weird," he says cheerfully, keeps one hand on Adam's ass, and pumps a couple of times with his other hand.

Please. Like he's going to trust Adam's instincts and Adam's body to keep everything securely inside the _first_ time. They have to _sleep_ in that bed, plastic sheets or not.

Adam jolts, head lifting, and Brad grins happily to himself when Adam's eyes open wider, more alert than he'd been a moment before. So Adam really didn't notice that feature of the nozzle. "That's..."

"Inflatable," Brad agrees, then, with more emphasis, "Secure."

"Fuck," Adam breathes, in tones of grateful realization and appreciation. (Shush, Brad can totes tell all of that from Adam's tones. He's studied them. He's an _expert_.) "So nothing's gonna... you know. Leak?"

"Nothing is gonna leak," Brad repeats firmly. "Trust me, baby. I've got this. I've got _you_."

Adam sighs and puts his head back on the pillow, shoulders lowering some as he relaxes. It's enough relaxation to make the nozzle bob lower as well, and Brad gives another quick pump, smiling his delight when that gets a startled sound from Adam. He moves his hand cautiously from the nozzle, growing more confident when it doesn't droop, then flicks it once. Mostly to check, but a little bit for the shiver it gets from Adam.

"Good," he says brightly, reaching out to wipe his hands clean on the nearest bit of towel. "So, are we all good to go?"

"I don't think I'm going anywhere." Adam turns his head to look back towards Brad, who has to admit the truth of that. He wouldn't go anywhere with a nozzle in his ass, either, but he still bends over to give Adam a kiss for it. 

Then another, because Adam's right, he's right there and he's not going anywhere and that makes him totally available for kissing. It also gives Brad a moment to reach up and check the temperature of the enema solution. Not quite as warm as he'd like - they've taken too long, and next time he'll remember that - but nowhere near cold enough for the kind of cramps that will actually hurt. "Tell me yes, Adam. I'm not gonna start anything without that yes, you know I need to hear it from you."

Hard and fast rule. If Adam wants something, Adam has to either ask for it or agree to it. Brad is _all_ about making really fucking sure that both of them actually want whatever they're planning on doing together.

Adam lifts his head, pushing for another kiss, neck straining, and Brad gives him _one_ because that effort deserves a reward, then pulls away out of reach, finding one of his sterner expressions when Adam drops back down to the pillow. "Say it, Adam." 

(If Adam doesn't say it soon, Brad’s totes going to need to warm the solution again and that’s another wait that he so doesn’t want.)

"Yes," Adam says, quiet but definite, and Brad kisses him for _that_ , quick and hard, before reaching up to flip the valve open on the tubing. It's fairly slow, which means it's going to take a fair amount of time to drain completely, but it should be relatively gentle on Adam and give him time to adjust. More, it gives Brad the chance to take the less-than-a-minute to get back around the bed to somewhere Adam can see him, and where he can see Adam's face. He crouches down, putting his head on a level with Adam's, then reaches out for more contact. One hand goes to rest on Adam's raised leg, since he can't reach Adam's ass from this angle, then his other hand goes to take Adam's hand, squeezing lightly. He's not going to be able to stay for long - nothing to do with balance, he's got awesome balance, he just wants to be able to see Adam from other angles _and_ be closer to the valve in case Adam needs him to stop the flow - but he's taking this moment to watch Adam's face and to let Adam see him. 

Another squeeze to Adam's hand prompts Adam to open his eyes, irises barely visible, pupils flared wide and dark. "Brad?"

"I'm here, baby," Brad says instantly, rubbing his thumb over the back of Adam's hand. "Right here, see? You're okay, you're doing so well for me."

"Feels weird," Adam admits, with the edge of a smile curving one side of his mouth. 

"New." Brad shrugs. "Just wait, it changes. It's going slowly, but it's gonna start feeling more full soon. Full's better." And he can't wait to see what that does to Adam's belly as well. "Does it feel hot? Cold?"

Adam takes time to consider, a blink keeping his eyes closed for a few seconds before he opens them again. "Not hot," he says slowly, as if he's trying to assess at the same time as answering. "Not cold, but... cool? Kinda?"

"Cool's okay," Brad promises, confirming his mental note to make sure it's warmer next time. "Tell me if it starts feeling tight." Tight, not full. Totally different, though Adam might not get that yet.

Adam nods, then his chest rises with a deeper breath as he squeezes Brad's hand in return. "It feels... different."

"Oh, it so does." Brad grins, glancing up to see how far the solution's dropped. "But not difficult yet, right?"

"Not..." Adam pauses, grip tightening on Brad's hand. "Wait, yet?"

"I never said this was going to be easy, princess." Letting go of Adam's leg, Brad pushes against the bed to stand up, tugging his other hand free of Adam's. "You know what to do if it gets too hard for you."

The enema, not anything else. Brad can already see that Adam's cock isn't as interested as it was earlier, but there's still time for that to change back.

"I know." Adam flattens his hand back against the bed. "It's not too hard."

This soon, Brad really hopes it's not too hard. Okay, he mostly hopes that all of it's not going to be too hard and that Adam's even going to get to enjoy it, but with luck and patience, Adam's going to start enjoying it soon. Of course, it's also going to get harder soon, but Adam at least knows to expect that.

"Of course it's not," he says firmly, patting Adam's thigh again before moving back around the bed, behind Adam again. "You can do this for me, baby. Keep breathing, nice and deep."

It's fascinating, watching Adam's face change. It's like, if Adam can't see him, Adam kind of assumes that Brad can't see Adam's face either. Adam relaxes, sort of, but mostly he's a lot more expressive. His lips part, some of the tension around his mouth eases, and a faint line of concentration forms between his eyebrows as he closes his eyes. 

It's a shame to lose the sight of Adam's eyes, but seeing the openness on his face is worth it. Brad settles into place, standing up close to the bed, resting his hand on Adam's hip as he leans forward, letting his eyes track down from Adam's face, over the freckles spread across his chest - and that Adam's chest is moving with his breathing is already telling Brad volumes about how much Adam's being affected, Adam's usually way better about breathing from his diaphragm - over Adam's ribs, down to where Adam's stomach is beginning to pouch out just a little. It's subtle, and anyone who's paid less attention to Adam's stomach probably wouldn't notice, but Brad's sure that the only person who's paid _more_ attention to the shape of Adam's stomach than he has is Adam.

Brad leans in, letting his hand slide with the movement until he's cupping Adam's stomach, pressing lightly. "There. You feel that? Feel how you're filling up? Is that beginning to feel like more?"

There's a soft sound from Adam, something that's not quite pleasure and not quite comfort. It's not an objection though, and it's not a pain sound - Brad knows most of Adam's pain sounds, and they're in a whole other register to this one - so Brad increases the pressure, rocking his hand gently to push against the liquid that's slowly filling Adam's bowel. Adam repeats the sound, slightly louder, and shifts his head restlessly, eyes still closed. "Brad..."

"Right here," he repeats, soft and serene. "Right here, you're doing so well for me. It doesn't hurt, right?"

"It doesn't hurt," Adam repeats, his voice a little lighter, a little breathier. "Doesn't... there's more?"

Brad takes a quick glance up at the bag before looking back at Adam. "Just a little more. You've got more than half now, it's running slowly for you. Just breathe deep and relax, accept it for me. We're gonna keep that in you for ten minutes, you're gonna have plenty of time to feel it, just take it now." 

Take it, God. Brad's almost giddy with how well Adam's taking it and how much Adam's trusting him. It's always a rush, but this is more, seeing Adam begin to drift and accept without any pain or any binding, just giving himself over to the moment completely of his own choice. The solution's running lower, gravity keeping the speed and pressure steady, and Adam's stomach's beginning to press harder against his hand. Brad pushes back - not hard, just firm - and starts rubbing instead of rocking, slow arcs across the curve forming there. "There, baby. Almost. You doing okay, still with me?"

"I'm here." There's a thicker edge to Adam's tone now, words a little slower, as if the weight of the water's pulling him back. "I'm okay. I'm... wow. Full."

"Full," Brad agrees with a grin that's no less wicked for the fact that Adam can't see it. "Now you know how I feel when you're fucking me, honey. Feel that filling you up? That's going to keep on stretching you, just that little bit, pushing against you..." And thank fuck for the inflatable ring around the base of the nozzle for keeping that pressure exactly where Brad wants it, which is all _inside_ Adam's ass.

Oh, yeah. There it is. The pressure Adam probably didn't expect, because anyone who _hasn't_ had their ass quite so full doesn't know - as Brad does, intimately, both from personal experience of enemas and from Adam's satisfyingly thick cock - that when there's pressure everywhere, that pressure just loves the prostate. And when that pressure's from liquid, it moves every time Adam moves, and breathing's enough to count as moving. 

Brad strokes his hand across Adam's stomach once more, pressing lightly, watching Adam's cock beginning to react to the pressure, hardening slowly. "Nearly there, baby. How're you doing? Give me words."

Words are apparently something that Adam's beginning to have trouble with. Brad totally wants Adam to have trouble forming sentences, but he also wants to hear those words _and_ see Adam work for them. He can be patient enough for Adam to find them. Besides, watching Adam lick his lips, open his mouth, close it again, swallow, is kind of enticing. 

"Full," Adam says eventually. Which, okay, is obvious, but it doesn't look like Adam's done, so Brad waits, starting to rub steady circles on Adam's stomach, keeping going even when Adam tries again. "Kind of... heavy?"

Brad nods, humming inquisitive encouragement. "Comfortable?"

"No." It's quick enough to be honest, heartfelt enough to make Brad laugh. "But it doesn't... hurt."

"No cramps?" He's tried. He's honestly tried. Adam's probably not read much more into the stomach rubs than reassurance, but Brad's trying to keep things moving evenly. He's not entirely sure about the temperature, still. 

Adam bites his lower lip, flesh whitening then flushing darker as he lets go to speak. "No... it's like... like it could, I could, but it's not quite..."

Okay. Warmer next time, but still. Potential is way better than actual cramps. "That's good," Brad says gently. "Okay. That's all in, it's gonna change a little now, just keep breathing nice and deep for me, keep it even. Slow it down for me."

If nothing else, it should give Adam something to focus on while Brad snaps the clamps closed again with the hand he's willing to move away from Adam. There's a little bit of the solution left, but he'd rather have a little bit left than let it run down enough for air to push inside Adam's ass along with it. 

Bottom clamp, top clamp. Done.

Cautiously, Brad eases the pressure of his hand against Adam's stomach, letting the weight of the water shape it. "There. You've got it all. All of that, you saw how much there was, that's all inside you. Just need you to hold that for ten minutes, that's all, just ten minutes."

They can build up to more. God, Brad hopes they're going to build up to more. It all depends on Adam liking it but that's so not a fair question to ask right now. Later, after, Brad will make sure they talk about it, but right now is all about getting Adam through it. Maybe ten minutes sounds like a short time, but there's a lot they can do in ten minutes.

Like, say, listen to some music. Just because Brad didn't want the whale song doesn't mean that he didn't take Cassidy's advice on music. He rests his left hand on Adam's hip, keeping contact, and reaches for the remote with his other hand to start the playlist he's pre-programmed. Nothing with lyrics that Adam could get distracted by, just something Brad remembers from a club they went to years ago. Something with a steady, electronic pulsing beat, but one that's slow enough not to get Adam's heartbeat up if he starts matching his breathing to it. 

Once that's started, Brad moves around the bed, back to where Adam can see him, switching hands on Adam's hip as he moves, keeping the contact as constant as he can. He puts his other hand on Adam's head, fingers curling into Adam's hair, tight enough to be able to pull. Just a light tug for now, but firm enough that Adam should be able to tell that it could be a lot harder. "Eyes open now, let me see you."

Adam's stopped talking. Sometimes that's a good thing. It's not usually a bad thing, because Adam's very vocal about anything he doesn't like, but it _is_ something that means Brad's lost one way of checking how Adam's doing, and it's not like he's done anything to physically block Adam's mouth. Still, it means that seeing Adam's eyes becomes that much more important.

When Adam does open his eyes, blinking slowly, they stay dark. Pupils wide, eyelids lower than usual, and okay, that's worth knowing. That's the look Adam gets when he's slipping down hard, which is both hot as hell and usually really fucking difficult to achieve, getting his beloved control freak to let go and give himself over that far. 

"Good," Brad breathes softly, easing his grip to stroke Adam's hair back. "That's good, so good for me, baby. Still with me?"

"Still here." Adam's words have slowed, his voice a little dreamy. "Just feeling."

"Feeling's good," Brad encourages. "Feeling full?"

Adam nods, a little jerky, head moving under Brad's hand. "Heavy full." 

Fuck, that's hot. That's amazing. It's not just that Brad can see that the enema's swelling Adam's stomach, he can see that it's turning Adam on, see Adam's beautiful cock hard from the pressure, see the darkness of Adam's eyes, but he can hear Adam's voice shifting as well with the echo of words from before instead of pushing to find new ones. Tone, speed, enunciation, it's all changing, and that's what gives him the push to look at Adam's posture because that has to be changing as well. That _is_ changing. Adam's neck looks longer, which means his shoulders are lower, slightly bowed forward where his arm's pressed against the mattress. His legs look more relaxed as well, hips angled a little closer to the bed, knee slipped further over. It's acceptance, it's trust, it's perfect, it's way more than Brad's been hoping for. 

Apart from the entirely expected reaction from Brad's cock, signaling enthusiastic approval, it's hitting his emotions as well. Of course he loves Adam, he can't do anything except love Adam, but this... this is totes rarer. This is pride and awe and gratitude and a determination to do absolutely anything he can to keep Adam like this. 

Like this, or better. Even perfection can be improved upon. 

Brad turns, fits his ass in the gap between Adam's raised knee and Adam's supporting hand, and sits, purposely wriggling. Partly to make sure he's fitting exactly where he wants to be, but mostly because he knows that it's going to make the mattress move, which is going to make Adam move, which is going to make the liquid in Adam's ass move, which is... oh, yeah. Which is going to make Adam gasp, fingers digging into the mattress. Brad grins, victorious, and rubs his hand along Adam's thigh, down to his knee, reaching back to his ass. "Okay, baby?"

"Fuck you," Adam manages, breathless and not entirely coherent.

Utterly delighted, Brad pats Adam's ass. "Maybe later, if you're good." Or awake, which is the one he's less convinced about. 

Adam's groan is a perfect illustration that asspats also move the liquid around inside him. Brad leans back - fairly gently - against Adam's torso, stroking Adam's thigh again. "Just a little longer." Then the real fun comes, when he needs to get Adam from the bed to the bathroom. It's less than six feet, but it's still going to be interesting for both of them. Admittedly, it's going to be more interesting for Adam than Brad.

"How long?" Adam asks. His voice is a little stronger, which Brad takes to mean that the pressure's making Adam more alert. Not the direction he wants to go in. 

Brad curls forward, hopping off the bed, and takes Adam's hand again, patting the back of it. He's pretty sure that can't do anything to make the enema move around inside Adam. "Six minutes." Though that can be less if Adam can't hold it. Nothing so far suggests that he won't be able to. 

"Six?" Adam tightens his hand around Brad's. 

"End of the next song," Brad adds, squeezing Adam's hand. "You can do it, princess. I know you can, you're doing so well."

"Heavy," Adam says again, closing his eyes.

Okay, right. Heavy's good if it's full, but if it's just heavy, Brad's going to get a lot more careful. "I know it is," he says simply. It, not Adam. "That's why it feels so good. All of that weight inside you, keeping you full for me, cleaning you out."

Adam lets out a quiet moan, thumb pressing hard against Brad's hand. It's not a pain sound, but it's not a completely happy sound either. Nowhere near as good as the sounds Adam was making when the liquid was still flowing into him, while pressure was building. Maybe more would have been better to start with, after all.

"You can _do_ this," Brad repeats more fiercely. "I know, baby. C'mon. Breathe for me, breathe through it, deeper, show me deeper, keep it slow... there. That's it, so good."

Better, at least. Deeper breathing gives Adam something else to focus on. Brad leans forward, reaching past Adam's cock, setting his hand flat against Adam's stomach again, fingers spread, not pushing. "Feel that, feel my hand? Feel how full you are for me. You took it so well, I know you're gonna keep it. Just five more minutes, see, you're halfway already."

Okay, so it's felt like quite a long five minutes to Brad. It's got to feel longer to Adam, but that just means that it's time for stage two. Stage two goes beyond encouragement and into distraction. "Did I say how hot you look like this?"

It gets Adam's eyes open, at least, even if the expression on his face is closer to incredulous than flattered. "Hot?"

"Totally hot," Brad says firmly. "And you know why? Because I know you're trying this for me, and that's amazingly hot. And fuck, look at you, what's not hot about you naked and hard?"

Half hard. No harm in a little exaggeration. 

Adam blinks. "Hot?"

Brad sighs, takes his hand back from Adam's stomach, and braces Adam's shoulder so he can pick Adam's hand up and place it on his own cock instead of Adam needing to use his hand for support. "Hot," he repeats. Because there's no way for Adam to miss that maybe Brad's words can mislead, but Brad's cock never lies, and Brad's cock thinks that Adam is totally hot.

Adam's fingers curl, hand shaping over Brad's cock through his pants, almost hesitant. "You really..."

"I really do," Brad agrees. "See? Or feel, anyway, you're feeling right now and you know what else is hot? That you _like_ this." It's a leap, sure, and they're still going to talk about it later, but Brad's going there anyway because he knows Adam by now. "You like the effort and if you let yourself, when you let yourself, you like how it feels."

He lets go of Adam's hand, pleased and relieved when Adam keeps it on his cock without Brad holding him in place. Okay, more than relieved, but relieved as well as the more. "So let yourself like it, Adam."

"Let?" Adam asks, licks his lips, and tilts his head to look up at Brad. 

"Let." Brad nods. "You were before, and you stopped." And this is not exactly the distracted he planned on. "C'mon, baby. You've got this. You can take it, you can hold it, just... tell me how it feels. Right now, tell me how it feels, how _you_ feel right now."

From the way Adam blinks, thinking’s still hard work, which is totally reasonable when Adam’s got his hand on Brad’s cock. He flexes his hips, just once, as close to subtle as he’s going to get, lets himself push in towards Adam’s hand and let Adam feel just how much he’s appreciating that effort. Adam’s hand tightens, fits around him more firmly, angle shifting to push the heel of his hand more solidly against the base of Brad’s cock which is… oh, yeah. That’s definitely awesome. Hot, sweet pressure. Brad lets his eyes close and purrs his pleasure, head rolling slowly back and around before he looks back at Adam. Adam’s hand, and Adam’s face. “Mm. Good, baby, but that’s not what I asked for, is it?”

It’s not what he’s thinking of asking for either, but the blow job can wait for later. Next time – there’s so going to be a next time – he can take the blow job while Adam’s ass is full for him. This time, he wants those words. 

Adam leaves his hand where it is, his thumb rubbing along the side of Brad’s cock in a seriously distracting and oddly sweet gesture, rhythm of it timed to – and Brad’s watching, he can see Adam’s chest move – Adam’s breathing, which means it’s matching his heartbeat. “Feels…” Adam tries again, word softened by a breathy edge, vowel sound more a sigh than anything more deliberately shaped. “Heavy. In my head.”

“Good,” Brad encourages, stroking Adam’s arm. Still warm, still strong, graceful line of it stretched from Adam’s shoulder across to him. Contact’s _good_. He’s all in favor of keeping up contact. “Anything else?”

“Fuzzy.” Adam’s lips twitch, curve into a smile that’s closer to sleepy than anything else. “Like… blurred. And heavy in my back.”

Heavy in Adam’s ass as well, Brad would bet money on it. Hell, Brad would bet his personal grooming routine for a week on it, which is worth way more than just money. “Good heavy or bad heavy? Achy?”

“Good,” Adam says without hesitation, then closes his eyes and lets out a sigh, long and soft. “Yeah. Good. Grounded.”

Brad allows himself a fond smile, drawing his hand back to tap his fingertips against the back of Adam’s wrist. “And warm enough?” He’s trying not to prompt Adam, really. For one, he wants Adam focused enough to work on finding his own words. For another, he wants absolute honesty, no risk of Adam saying something because he thinks it’s what Brad wants to hear. Still, if Adam’s cold or hurting, that’s more important to know than making Adam think through it. “Are you cold?”

“Not cold.” Adam’s thumb goes still, hand twitching once but staying on Brad’s pants. “Just… warm.”

“Okay, baby.” Brad pulls his hand back to cover Adam’s, resting lightly over it. “Too hot?”

Adam hesitates then shakes his head, slow and uneven. “No. ‘S good.”

Something there’s not completely good. Brad gently lifts Adam’s hand away from his cock, guiding it back to the bed for support, and crouches down again, keeping both of his hands on Adam and keeping that contact going. “You like it?”

“Yeah,” Adam says readily, quietly, then takes another breath, deeper, sharper. “Brad…”

Brad tightens his grip. “Right here, baby. What’s going on?”

“How much longer?” Adam licks his lips and swallows, but he’s not opening his eyes, and he’s beginning to get a little crease between his eyebrows where he’s drawing them together. Less relaxation, more concentration, more effort. 

“One minute.” It’s hard to remind himself to look away from Adam towards the clock, but at least Brad knows this playlist and how long it runs. It’s close to the end, but that doesn’t mean Brad can’t be flexible. If Adam needs to hold it for longer, they can do that. There’s an extra track, in case. On the other hand, if Adam needs to let go…

Adam nods, pulse jumping in his neck, and bites his lip. “It’s… pressing…”

Okay, well, that’s predictable enough, but so is Adam not knowing the sensations enough to express them clearly. No assumptions. “Inside? Or like you need to let go?”

“Inside.” Adam takes another breath, shallower. “Like… oh, fuck…”

Like cramps. Brad tightens his grip on Adam’s hand, stroking his free hand over Adam’s side, reaching to press against Adam’s stomach again. It’s harder from this side, from this angle, but he’s not about to take the time to move around behind Adam again, and he’s not letting go. “Okay, baby. You’re okay, just breathe for me, I know. Keep it slow, nice and deep, focus for me, stay with me, feel that?”

Light pressure, then slow rubbing, keeping the weight steady, smooth circles over Adam’s stomach. “Keep in time with me. Just relax, I know you can do that. Breathe deep, focus on my hand. I’ve got you, c’mon, Adam. That’s it.”

That’s so it. That’s Adam stopping breathing for a moment before he starts to follow Brad’s voice, follow Brad’s hand, and Brad can feel the shift in Adam’s breathing just as clearly as he can feel the liquid inside Adam moving around with his hand. He’s not sure which one’s making Adam relax, but he’s sure as shit not wanting to stop either. “There, baby, see, you’ve got this. Keep going, just relax, nothing’s gonna come out yet, trust me.”

Soon, but they’re going to need to move before that. Before they move, Brad needs Adam to know, to _trust_ , that he can do it and that he’s safe. 

Slowly, gradually, Adam relaxes. It’s so fucking clear on his face, tension Brad hadn’t seen start clearer as it fades, lips less tight, forehead smoothing out. They’re a little over ten minutes, the next song started, but Brad’s taking the timing for this from Adam and his body now, not the clock or the music. 

“There,” he says softly, hand slowing. He’s not stopping, but he is slowing down and easing back, moving to arcs instead of circles, seeing Adam’s breathing deepen, chest moving less, ribs expanding and falling with the bigger breaths. “There. So good for me, that’s it. Better?”

“Better,” Adam agrees, then laughs, light and unsteady, another level of tension fading. “Fuck, better. Thanks.”

“Oh, don’t go thanking me yet.” Brad grins, moving his hand to Adam’s hip. “Just tell me when you’re ready to move.”

That gets Adam’s eyes open again, wide and dark, fixed on Brad’s face. “Move?”

Brad’s grin widens. “Sure, baby. You’re not gonna hold onto that forever. We talked about this, right?”

Granted, they’d talked about it before Adam knew how it felt to have two quarts of liquid plugged inside his ass, but they’d definitely talked about it. 

Adam’s eyes close again and he groans, low and heartfelt. “Fuck.”

“That comes after,” Brad agrees, strokes Adam’s thigh, and pushes back to stand up. “Come _on_ , I've got you. Just think how good it’s gonna feel when all of that’s gone.”

“I hate you,” Adam mutters, pressing his newly free hand against the mattress. “And I can’t move.”

“You totally love me,” Brad says confidently. “And you so can move. C’mon, princess. Just roll. Sit up for me. Yeah, I _know_ it’s gonna feel weird, but trust me on this.”

The thing that most people miss about Brad is how strong he is. Okay, he’s tiny, especially compared to Adam, but that wiriness is muscle, not fragility. Adam should know better by now, but Brad isn’t ashamed to admit (isn’t ashamed of most things, honestly) that he still enjoys it when he can surprise Adam. Like now, taking a grip on both of Adam’s arms and pulling him up to his feet before his movement actually rolls him far enough to put his weight on the plug and the tube still attached to it. Okay, so he has to let go again pretty quickly to wrap his arms around Adam – around his ribs, safely away from the swelling of the water – to make sure Adam’s balanced. It has to feel all kinds of overwhelming for Adam to feel that liquid move around inside him, and the change from lying down to standing is going to be the biggest movement that Adam makes with all of that still inside him. 

_Staying_ inside him. 

Gravity has an effect. Gravity’s now helping push all of that down onto the plug, and from the expression on Adam’s face (which Brad neither laughs at nor photographs, despite immense temptation), that’s not a feeling that Adam’s been expecting. 

“Clench down, princess,” Brad says briskly, holding on, head tipped back to watch the startlement slowly fade from Adam’s expression. Adam’s eyebrows come down sooner than his eyes go back to normal openness, but both of them happen, along with Adam’s lips parting on a slow, very cautious-looking breath. 

“You could have warned me,” Adam protests, breathy and slow, breaks between words.

“You’d only have been dreading it,” Brad counters, finally easing his hold when he feels Adam’s weight shifting back from him. “And now you’re up.” And thank fuck he’d had the foresight to leave enough play in that tubing to let Adam get up without anything pulling out or over. “You good to just stand on your own for a moment? Just for a moment.”

Adam takes a few seconds before replying – which is good, which is actually awesome, because it means he’s thinking about it and that he’s having trouble thinking about it – and finally shakes his head. “Not yet.”

“Okay, baby.” Not yet worked. Not yet meant Brad keeping one arm around Adam and stretching to unhook the bag instead of walking around, but he could do that, and if it helped Adam, he was all in favor. “Okay. Just breathe for me, tell me when you’re ready to walk.”

“Walk?” Adam wrinkles his nose. “I have to walk before this comes out, right?”

“Well, unless you _want_ to use the bucket…” Not Brad’s preferred option, but it wasn’t there only for testing the flow before. Emergencies happen. Emergencies are way less hassle with preparation, and he _did_ prepare for that particular option.

From the look on Adam’s face, he’s not in favor of the bucket, either.

“So, walking,” Brad concludes. “Small steps, if you keep it smooth it’s easier.” Less movement inside. 

“And _you_ want it to be easier now?” Adam arches an eyebrow, tightens his hold on Brad’s shoulders, and tries a tentative step. 

“Now, sure.” Brad grins and goes with Adam, urging him forward, towards the bathroom. “This time. Keep _going_ , it’s better than stopping and starting.”

“Feels weird.” Adam’s ribs shift as he takes another deep breath, but he does keep moving. 

Moving’s good. Moving, slow as it is, gets them both into the bathroom, and Brad presses the pump into Adam’s hand. “So. You press this button _here_ , it deflates – hold on to this or everything falls right down. You need me to stay?”

The expression on Adam’s face answers that way more clearly than words ever could.

“So.” Brad nods and pats Adam’s arm. “You leave the plug in the basin, you call out when you’re done, I’ll come help you move again. Okay?”

Adam nods, expression tight. Everything tight, now Brad takes his chance to look down Adam's body. “Brad, just _go_.”

Okay, then. Nearly okay. “What’s the magic word?”

Not that Brad’s waiting to hear it, but it’s still sweet to hear Adam’s strained “please” following after him as he closes the bathroom door and gives Adam at least the illusion of privacy. The door’s not locked, and it’s not soundproofed either, but it’s solid, and solid is a good barrier. 

It also gives Brad a few minutes to clear away the rigged stand and strip off the plastic sheet. The towels can stay close at hand, but the plastic’s done its job and the worst peril’s passed. He’s got enough time to get it folded and stowed back in a drawer before he hears Adam’s voice – his voice this time, not just sounds – from behind the bathroom door.

Brad detours to pick up Adam’s robe and a bottle of water – which takes all of ten seconds, thank fuck for tiny apartments – before knocking lightly on the door. “Ready for me now?”

“Yeah.” Adam’s voice is faint through the door, slightly muffled but clear, as is the slight hesitation before he adds, “Please.”

That gets a grin that Brad makes no attempt to hide as he opens the door, looking around for Adam. Not sitting on the toilet, so he’s managed to move far enough to rest on the side of the tub, one hand braced against the vanity, his freckles more noticeable than usual as a contrast to pale skin. “Next time,” Brad says firmly, “I’m not leaving you alone.”

He stands the water bottle on the floor, shaking Adam’s robe out to wrap it around Adam’s shoulders before sitting down next to him, snugged up to his side. “Just a few more minutes here then we’ll get you to bed.”

“Here?” Adam moves enough to get his arms into his robe, and then his arms around Brad, which Brad is all in favor of. “I’m done in here.”

“No, baby,” Brad says, more gently. “You’re not. Trust me.”

Adam closes his eyes, then bends far enough to rest his face on Brad’s shoulder, which just makes it easier for Brad to reach up to stroke his hair. “Seriously?”

“Just a few more minutes,” Brad promises. “How’re you feeling?”

“Like I wanna get to bed.” Adam sighs, tightening his hold on Brad. “Cold. Light.”

Brad manages to suppress the snort of laughter at that. “Well, you’re two quarts of liquid lighter,” he points out. “So, more than that?”

“More than that,” Adam agrees. “Like… floaty?”

Floaty’s good. Floaty and light are both good, and so is the fact that Adam hasn’t immediately vetoed a next time. Cold’s not so good, but that’s why Brad brought the robe in and he can’t really do much more about that except for sharing body heat. At least, not until Adam’s ready for bed. “That’s good, baby. You feel good?”

Adam hums, light and soft. “Floaty good. And empty.” 

Empty’s another obvious one that doesn’t really tell Brad that much about how Adam’s actually feeling, but as long as Adam’s still talking and thinking about it, it’s all good. “How about proud?” he suggests.

“Proud?” Adam echoes, then tenses, fingers digging into Brad’s shoulder. “Oh, shit…”

“Yeah,” Brad agrees, sliding free and tugging Adam back to his feet. “Told you you’re not done. You take care of that now.”

Adam nods, eyes closed. “Go?”

Brad sighs. “So talking about this for next time.” Still, he goes, leaving Adam in privacy for whatever his body insists on. 

It gives him a chance to pick up the bucket again anyway, and once Adam’s done, he fills it from the bath tap, adding in some antibacterial soap and dropping the plug, bag and tubing in to soak. Then washes his hands thoroughly, presses the bottle of water into Adam’s hand, and slides under Adam’s arm again. “Now we can go to bed.”

“I’m done?” Adam asks hopefully.

“Probably.” It’s not like it’s impossible that there’s more, but still, that really should be most of it. “Come on, princess. Move that gorgeous ass and we’ll get you warmed up.”

Walking out of the bathroom is a lot easier than walking into it, even if Adam’s a lot droopier. Brad manhandles him into bed, pulls the towels out of the way and the blankets up before stripping out of his own clothes to curl up behind Adam, spooned up against him. “Proud,” he repeats, going back to before as if the interruption never happened. “Because I’m proud of you, baby.”

Adam slides his hand over Brad’s, guiding them both down inside his robe to his stomach. Only to his stomach and no further, but that’s fine. Adam’s cock will still be there when Adam’s warmed up, and right now, it’s Adam’s stomach that’s back to being flat and smooth. The contrast is all kinds of delicious. (Brad promises himself the pleasure of kissing it later, until he can get Adam squirming for him. Or until Adam’s erection’s bumping against his chin. Or both.) He spreads his fingers wide, covering as much as he can and giving space for Adam’s fingers to fit between them. 

Adam sighs, melting back against Brad in a supremely satisfying manner. “Proud?”

“Uh huh.” Brad presses a kiss to Adam’s shoulder. “You took that so well for me. All of it, and you held it, and you were so hot. All full for me.” He sighs happily. No more talk of next time. Not yet. They can go back to that when Adam’s had time to recover, and maybe even think about it some more. “Love it when you drift for me.”

Which is totally encouragement for Adam to let himself drift again, except this time it’s going to be safe to let him drift into sleep. Adam’s warming up as he’s relaxing, and relaxing as he’s warming up, and it’s just gorgeous. Brad kisses the back of Adam’s neck, lingering to nip lightly. “Love you too.”

Adam’s hum is definitely warmer and sleepier, but more appreciative. That’s fine. Brad will get the words from him later. Repeatedly. For now, he settles in more comfortably against Adam, cheek pressed to Adam’s shoulder blade, and holds on, letting Adam drift, and letting himself enjoy and be pulled along with Adam’s drifting.

**Author's Note:**

> Many thanks to lvs2read for the beta and to the ladies of the Kradam mailing list for encouraging this, even if it's not actually Kradam.


End file.
